Saturday, October 23, 2010

Ducks @ Red Wings

4 : Anaheim Ducks @ Detroit Red Wings : 5

Nothing much to note before delving into this. We all know how our last game turned out against the Ducks during the season opener. Dan O'Halloran reffed this game, and he doesn't stand for foolishness, so after four penalties in the first period things quieted down and a ridiculous penalty-free hockey match was played.

And oh, what a match...

Some Notes From The Game:

Corey Perry sets the mood by making his first act giving Jimmah a snow shower. Shmuck.

Helm skates fast.

We knock a linesman on his ass.

Ken finds time to let us know that Tuzzi has a point in every game but one this season.

Cleary draws an interference penalty and we load up our power play units.

Ken makes sure we know that Ducks are the most penalized team in the NHL. This news pleases me.

We squander the power play. Of course we do.

Teemu Selanne gets absolutely Kronwalled. 


Obviously, the Ducks don't appreciate that, so an attempt is made to decapitate Franzen that is thankfully unsuccessful.

No love for the Mule

After narrowly avoiding the attempt at manslaughter, Franzen and Perry collide in open ice. Perry gets called for interference. And for being a tool.

You're not foolin' anyone, Perry

Power play time.

Zetterberg's goal:

Holmstrom makes a very nice pass from behind the goal up to Lidstrom on the point. Lidstrom goes for a slapshot fake that's actually a shot-pass to Zetterberg, who one-times it through the Holmstrom screen and in.

 Look! There's Lilja!

After this goal we get a closer look at the 'supposed' interference call on Perry, because Mick will not shut up about what a god-awful call it was.

And I'm somehow left with the feeling that Mick's not watching the same video as I am.

Because Mick will not shut up about it, and I think Mick's being an idiot, we'll dissect the event.

Here's the Mule. Dunno what he's looking at, but he's looking down ice and skating the other way.

Losing interest in whatever he was looking at, the Mule turns his head to watch where he's skating. He has a very clear 'oh shit!' moment when the first thing he sees is the impending collision.

Perry, heading to the bench for a shift change, is looking RIGHT at him.

Franzen makes a quick, unsuccessful attempt to stop and twist out of the way.

Corey Perry, on the other hand, does nothing. Doesn't slow down, speed up, or deviate his course. He actually brings up his shoulder to let it take the brunt of the hit just before it happens.

The ref sees that Franzen tried to avoid the collision, while Perry chose to let it happen, and rightfully nails Perry for interference. This was a direct response to the Kronwalling of Selanne earlier, just like the guy trying to decapitate Franzen just a minute ago.

Sometimes Mick can be really annoying.

Next, Koivu takes a penalty for tripping Homer.

Larry is convinced the Ducks will dissolve under adversity.

Power play. Lidstrom takes at least 4 solid slapshots from the line. Franzen hits the side of the net.

As the PP comes to a close, there's a big ricochet around the crease that draws a few gasps from the crowd, but no goal.

The Ducks lose Sexton, who gets drilled in the face with the puck. It... looked like it hurt. A lot.

Oh god. There's blood.

Sexton is the same guy Shane Doan got suspended for hitting blindside to the head. The guys in the truck give us a view of that hit while we wait for the medical guys to do their thing and the blood to be cleaned off the ice. Shane Doan is a shmuck.

Shot of Maltby looking down on the game. He's clearly enjoying his new scouting job, judging by the enthusiasm on his face.

Maltby is all smiles

Helm goes off for hooking.

The Ducks have a very poor power play.

Next, we learn that Pavel Datsyuk is a sick human being. This play merits dissection.

Datsyuk and Helm go absolutely flying into the offensive zone together.

Datsyuk is the one with the puck. He decides to pull the emergency brake and comes to a screeching halt in front of the goal. Everyone else goes flying past him, because who on earth does that?

What the-

Datsyuk just stands there waiting patiently for a solid second – Kronwall comes charging up the middle. Dats makes the pass.

 Glad you could join us, Kronner

Kronwall one-times it, but Duck goalie makes the save.



The Ducks respond to this ridiculous play by scoring in the last twenty seconds of the period.


The Second Period:

Randy Carlyle smiles. It was too quick for a photo, but it happened.

Janik starts the period by falling on his ass for no reason. He manages to keep the puck in, though.

This is followed by the Ducks hitting the goal post.

The Ducks get a series of odd-man rushes.

Kindl breaks his stick and Helm, ever the gentleman, gives him his. And then absolutely dumps some Duck before heading back to the bench. I smiled.

More sticks are broken. I groan, knowing what's coming up.

Discussion of hockey sticks.

Ken, Mick, and Larry happily oblige. Did you know that an average player goes through up to 120 sticks a season? At 200 bucks a pop, however many players on a team... well, you do the math.

Mick squeezes a wooden stick comment in there.

Of course he does.

This next commercial break is hilarious, because it's a short clip of the Ducks and the Wings in the 2007 Conference Final (and we all know how that ended up...) and it's that dipshit Perry shouting at Datsyuk during a faceoff. I'll directly quote here;

“Hey, tell Samuelsson he's going to get it. You'd better tell him! Hey Pavel, you'd better tell him! You're gonna get it, too!”

Pavel looks on in disinterest

And then, of course, some shots of Perry and Datsyuk fighting it out in the season opener.

Ahh, the memories.

The Ducks score moments later when Jimmah gives up a rebound and Salei just misses clearing it.

34 seconds later they score again. This one hits the goalpost and ricochets in. They review the goal, as it was hard to tell because the puck came right back out, but the goal is awarded.

 Damn goal posts...

Great. Now we're down 3-1.

During a break, we learn Mick was the first Red Wing to tally 50 goals in a season, when he nabbed 52 in the 72-73 season. At the time, he was the 7th NHL player to score 50. Nice to know

Franzen's goal:

Bertuzzi, after drawing a delayed penalty for hooking, retains possession and brings the puck around the back of the net.
Coming around the other side, he dishes it across to Franzen, who gets a shot off. The shot is blocked by the goalie's pad and sits just outside the goal line. Franzen gets a few solid whacks at it before finally forcing it in.

 The Mule collects garbage

In celebration, Ken lets us know that over the last 3 seasons, Franzen has 19 game winning goals. That means 25% of Franzen's goals have been game winners. That leads the NHL, and is a truly ridiculous statistic.

Kindl runs into the back of the net. Idiot.

Kronwall dodges death when two Ducks decide to check him at the same time, but end up checking each other.

 Man sandwich

There's a funny moment when a Duck breaks a stick behind the net during a routine shift change. Danny is ALL over that shit. The poor guy has no choice but to play the puck with his glove.

Cleary, Modano, and Hudler then have a very nice shift, but no scoring.

Bertuzzi's next shift grants us a spin-o-rama to Filppula, but no scoring.

First line makes its appearance, to follow up the last two excellent shifts and show those boys how it's done.

Holmstrom's goal:

First of the season. Getzlaf turns the puck over in the neutral zone. Getzlaf makes a pass that Zetterberg manages to get a little stick onto. Stuart corrals the puck at the blue line and slaps it on goal. Holmstrom deflects it en route with his stick and in.

 Business as usual

Tie game.

The Red Wings prove, yet again, that it ain't over 'till it's over.

We now have three unanswered goals. Lets do this.

The Third Period:

The DJ gets us started with Piano Man over the loudspeakers. It's niine o'clock on a Saturdaay~

Hey, wait! It is 9 o'clock on a Saturday!

I see what you did there.

Some hockey happens the first few minutes. Nick swats a puck out of the air.

Helm has a nice shift.

Ken makes sure we know that Bertuzzi leads the team in assists and points. Of course he does.

Nick bats the puck out of the air with his stick for the fifth time. Nick is working on his hand-eye coordination this game. Show-off.

Nick knows I just typed that comment and does it yet again, which is followed seconds later by a sick tape to tape pass across the neutral zone.

Ken and Mick drop the fact that Selanne is just one point away from tying Bobby Hull for 15th on the all-time scoring list. 

So of course he scores.

Nabs a loose puck in the offensive zone, beats Kronwall with some sick speed along the boards, and nails Jimmah five-hole. Unassisted.


And there goes our lead.

Zetterberg nabs a puck during a forecheck on Lilja and Tuzzi gets a nice shot on goal. No success. The play does nab status as the Degree for Men's Top Protection moment. So there's that.

Franzen and Filp manage a nice play. The pairing of these two draws much approval from Ken and Mick.

 Did we just become best friends?

We score off the next faceoff.

Zetterberg's goal:

Datsyuk wins the faceoff. Lidstrom collects the puck and dishes to Stuart, who's centered on the blue line. Stuart lets a slap shot go. Zetterberg deflects it en route and in.

 Sorry, Homer. You already got yours tonight.

A remark is dropped that Datsyuk doesn't have a point yet tonight, and is due.

Helm gets a nice shot on goal, but is robbed by Duck goalie.

Commercial break we get a shout out to the Spartans. GO GREEN!!!

We come back to Ken and Mick, who let us know that it's a mile-marker night for Nick too.

Nick has finally passed Denis Potvin on the all-time list for defensemen and is now in sole possession of 6th place. About him rests Larry Murphy with 1216. Ray Bourque rules over all at 1st with 1579.

Ken remarks it'd take about four more years before Nick could pass Larry. Larry laughs, remarking that if anyone could do it, it'd be Nick.

I agree.

Zetterberg and Datsyuk throw a series of parties in the offensive zone. Getzlaf turns over another puck. We get at least four very good shots on goal. Robbed by Duck goalie.

We narrow on the last minute.

Top line is out. Party in the offensive zone. People in the crowd start to stand. You can almost feel the victory at hand.

We try for a shift change – Holmstrom switches with Cleary, everyone else gets stuck on the ice.

Datsyuk's goal:

Lidstrom on the left point lets a slapshot go. It hits someone in front and bounces away. Datsyuk corrals the rebound, throws a few dekes into the play, and shoots it between Cleary's legs and in with 11 seconds left on the clock.

Don't worry. I got this.

Everyone is extremely pleased.

Don't Think We Didn't Notice:

 Almost missed this one-

Don't Mess With The Mule

Franzen dumps someone into the Red Wing bench. This action is always a pleasure to see.

Dan O'Halloran put a lid on the foolishness tonight, so no one served with pride.

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